Life in the Garden

Ok.  Kelley has shamed me by updating her blog before I got to mine.  I know I have not been blogging like I should lately, but we have been growing a garden.

It is amazing how much time and effort goes into a garden, but the rewards are so worth it.  Brenna loves going out each morning to look for "treasures".  It is a great learning experience to see how nature works together to make things grow.  We thank the Lord for the buzzing bees that pollinate our plants.  We see the praying mantis, and thank God that it is eating the bugs that would harm our garden.  We watch the plants' flower and the flowers turn into "baby veggies" that grow into vegetables ready to pick.

I also love sharing the things I learned at my Nana's knee with my kids.  Things like how to know when the vegetables are ripe.  How to can or freeze them for later use.  And most of all.... snapping beans!  I can remember sitting on Nana's front porch in the evening.  We'd watch the cars come and go, sing songs, and snap green beans.  It has become such a calming and therapeutic activity to me - full of wonderful memories of summers with Nana and Granddaddy.  Now I can sit on my front porch, watch the cars come and go, sing songs, and snap beans with my kids.  All while giving them memories to hold onto when they are older.

This year we added a much larger garden to our small kitchen garden.  We always end up with more than we can eat or put up, and give the extra away to friends.  Since I'm still job-hunting, we decided to plant more and sell all the extra vegetables.  God has truly blessed us with a plentiful harvest, and just enough customers.  We have some customers that have only come once, but many more who have returned.  We are getting to know some of our neighbors better.  We are meeting neighbors we had not had a chance to meet.  So many from our church have blessed us by coming by, as well.  It has been such a blessing.

I am thankful for the work that keeps my mind and body busy.  I am thankful for the time with my kids and the memories we are making.  I am thankful for the hard work my husband puts into the garden each evening, and the time we get to spend together as a family.  I am thankful for the provision of food that I don't have to buy at the store.  I am thankful for the new friends we are making and the friendships that are growing closer and deeper than before.  I am thankful for a God who had this as His plan for me this summer, and who has the rest of my days in His hands.

So, how does your garden grow?  Check out ours on facebook at Huffman's Fresh Vegetables!

Bucket List

I was watching Scotty McCreery and Tim McGraw singing Tim's hit "Live Like You Were Dying" on American Idol, and it got me to thinking.  There's a trend of people creating "bucket lists".  That list of things you want to see or do before you die.  Things like "see the Grand Canyon", or "go skydiving", or even "find the world's best pizza (or die trying!)".  While I am all about setting goals and working to achieve them, I think we should probably be looking at this a little differently.

As a Christian I am here to glorify God, but most bucket lists read more like Superman's To-Do list than God's Glory list.  It has little to do with God and a lot to do with satisfying me, and my (super)ego.  If I am truly living like I'm dying, then my focus shouldn't be on doing what I want.  It should be on bringing glory to God, and sharing Him with others.

Today could be my last - I'm not guaranteed tomorrow.  What did I do today to plant a seed for Jesus?  How did I reflect the Lord in my coming and going today?  Who did I reach out to in love?  Who did I forgive?  Who did I help?  How was I Jesus' hands and feet today?

If I am living like I'm dying, then my focus should not be on me, but on those who still need Jesus.  Those who are without hope unless someone (me) tells them about THE GREAT HOPE.  How are my daily conversation and deeds leading others to Christ?

I have to think that when I stand before God, He's not going to be concerned about whether or not I had that pizza.  He's going to want to know how I lived my life for Him on a daily basis.  He'll want to know how hard I tried to tell others about Him.  He'll want to know who I helped in His name.

So, maybe it's time for a new bucket list.  One that includes things like "go on a mission trip - foreign and domestic", or "share with those in prison", but more importantly "live for Jesus - Daily".

Got it together - for now, anyway!

Okay.  So I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of this being home thing.  I have actually managed to have dinner ready (and sometimes even on the table) when my husband gets home from work.  I manage to do some sort of workout almost every day.  Brenna and I have a set devotion time each afternoon.  Seth is starting to nap only once per day and go to bed at a decent hour.  Things are looking up!

Now, life isn't perfect (someone still wakes early in the morning and wants to go to bed with Mommy!), but things are finally starting to settle.  Of course, things will change once school is out.  Then I'll have to rework the whole schedule - isn't that always the way?  Just when I think I have things under control something will inevitably happen to "shake things up".  I guess the Lord just doesn't want me getting complacent and thinking I can handle things all by myself (because THAT would be a disaster!).

I did have a phone interview for a job, which was encouraging.  There just isn't much out there right now, and there are still a lot of qualified people looking for work.  So, I'll be content to take care of home and family until the right job comes along.

We have expanded the garden this year, so we can have a vegetable stand to sell veggies.  So be looking for us, and come get some fresh veggies for dinner!  Darien is a great gardener!

Kelley is back from her trip to see the kids and grandkids, so The Scarlet Chord will be rehearsing again.  I'm looking forward to really buckling down and getting some new songs worked out.  I know the Lord has a plan for this and the Pottery Wheel ministry, and am looking for things to get busy on this front, too.  I want to use my talents for His glory, and am excited to be working toward that goal again!

I'm going to bask in these last few days of feeling like I have it all "together", and prepare for the whirlwind that will become the norm over the next few weeks.  I'm just thankful that all the activity means I am a useful human being, especially when being used by the Lord.

By the way, since I've asked for accountability with my Weight Watcher's program...... I lost 6.5 lbs the first week!  YAY!!  Thanks for your support!

"Sheepish" Thoughts.....

Psalm 23 (mingling KJV and NIV)

The Lord is my shepherd.....I guess that makes me the sheep!  Contrary to popular belief, I am not in charge, He is in charge.  He is the shepherd - the Good Shepherd.  Everything else only applies if I am the Good Sheep, and follow the shepherd.

I shall not want.....it is the shepherd's job to find places that are good for the sheep.  I will reap the reward, IF I continue to follow the shepherd.  If I strike out on my own, then the shepherd is no longer providing for my needs, and I am lost.

He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside still waters....no matter what is going on around me, I am assured of green pastures and still waters along the journey to rest - IF I continue to follow the shepherd.  He knows life can be a distraction, but He also knows the best way for me to go.  I just have to follow Him.

He restores my soul....not only will I find physical rest, but also spiritual renewal - IF I follow the shepherd.  If I wander from the shepherd, my soul will find no rest.

He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.....the shepherd knows the best path.  The path that will lead me to those places of growth (lots of green grass and water!) and rest.  And in the end I will be a sheep that brings glory to his name - IF I follow the shepherd.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and staff, they comfort me....the valley of the shadow of death is not scary - IF I am following the shepherd.   If I am following Him, then HE will lead me safely through, unscathed, and His rod and staff are at the ready to protect me.  However, if I have wandered astray and end up in this valley, I am in danger.  Luckily, He is the Good Shepherd who leaves the flock to find the one lost lamb.  He will arrive with His rod and staff to protect me, but I will leave with the scars I reap from my disobedience.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies....those who wish to do me harm may be nearby sharpening their claws, but I can put my head down and eat in peace - IF I am with the shepherd (he still has that rod and staff, you know!)  The Enemy will wait for me to stray from the shepherd to do me harm.

You anoint my head with oil, my cup overflows....priests are anointed.  They are allowed direct access to God.  I am allowed direct access to the Good Shepherd.  He calls me by name (John 10:3) and I know His voice (John 10:4).  I am filled with joy - IF I stay with the shepherd.

Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever....goodness and love will always be with me - IF I stay with the shepherd, for He is Love and all that is good.  If I follow Him, then at the end of my days I will live with Him in the place He has prepared for me (John 14:2-3) - IF I have trusted my life to the shepherd!

Changes

It's official.  I am the mother of a one year old toddler.  Things are changing around the house.  He also decided that it was time to wean, so I am no longer getting my early morning baby snuggles while he nurses.  *sigh*

With that comes the realization that it is time to do something about the remaining baby weight.  Nursing will no longer be helping me lose the weight, so it is time for a new plan.  After encouraging a friend today who just started Weight Watchers (hereafter WW), I realized that I needed a plan.  I used WW a few years ago and had great success - losing over 20 lbs.  Of course, I am starting all over again now!

So, tonight after dinner, I went online and signed up for WW online.

It would be easy to say "I've done this before" or "I know how to do this" and rest on my laurels.  However, I am a different person in a different situation.  Last time I did weekly meetings at work, so this online "thing" will be different.  I also had a competition with some other girls I worked with for a mani/pedi (and I won!).  This time it is just me, getting back in shape and getting healthy. I hope I find I am as motivated and successful as before.

I am asking those of you who have regular contact with me to help keep me motivated and accountable.  I want to be back in my old wardrobe, but the big thing is being healthy and more energetic for my family.  Please help me keep my focus, and talk me through the "plateau" weeks.  And if you are with me, definitely talk me out of the extra helping of dessert!

I couldn't do this without determination, and help from my family and friends.  Most of all keep reminding me to take it to the Lord in prayer.  I am not always the most disciplined person (no snickering!), but I know that if it is His will - I will accomplish my goal.

As things continue to change around my house - I'm hoping that my external changes won't be the only changes.  I'm hoping that this will be a journey in praying without ceasing and seeing other changes for the better in my life.  Journey with me, and we'll see how things go!

Provision ... Why Am I Surprised?

You've done it again, Lord, and again I am surprised.  I don't know why I continue to be surprised when the Lord provides for me and those around me.  Maybe it isn't that He did it, but how He did it.  Let me fill you in on my last few days...

I am part of a Christian trio known as The Scarlet Chord.  We sing where ever we are called to minister, and love doing it.  One of the girls in the group is married to a man who makes pottery as a hobby.  He also uses his pottery as a ministry, and we usually go along to accompany his ministry with song when he is busy actually making something on the wheel.  The Pottery Wheel ministry took place last night (Friday).  On Thursday, I realized I was coming down with a sinus infection causing a sore throat - OH NO!  I went to the doctor Friday morning, and got antibiotics, but I was not going to be 100% by that evening.

I called Kelley, the potter's wife, to let her know.  I wasn't cancelling - I knew we were called to do this ministry - but one of the songs we planned to sing was primarily carried by me, so we had to brainstorm.  Kelley called me back that afternoon to let me know that the Lord had been telling her for a couple weeks to sing a solo, but she had been fighting it.  She would substitute her solo for my song.  I guess the Lord will have His way even if He has to make me sick to do it - Thanks, Kel!!  :D

Talking to Vivian, the other member of the group, later that evening, she confessed having a very bad attitude going into the ministry.  A very traumatic experience from her past was keeping her from having her heart in the right place as we started.  By the end of the evening, Billy's (he's the potter if you haven't figured that out) message actually spoke to her, and the Lord set her free from an experience that had haunted her for years.  We had gone to minister, and had been ministered to in the process - You sure are sneaky sometimes, Lord!

So here we come, a broken group of sinners saved by grace, to show God's love and share His message with a group of men.  Billy's focal passage was Mark 10:27 "... with man it is impossible, but with God all things are possible."  Boy is it ever!  Half of our group was not up to par with my physical issues, and Vivian's spiritual/emotional issues, but God found strength in our weaknesses.  He provided healing for Viv, and strengthened my voice so that no one could tell I was ill when singing.  And you know what, God used this rag tag bunch to help bring a lost soul the final few steps to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.  That's right, even our imperfections couldn't stop God from calling this new brother to himself last night.  It was his first day with the group, and God made sure he was there to hear a lesson that would speak to his heart.  Lord, I'm starting to see that You really meant it when you said "exceedingly, abundantly".

I know that sounds like more than enough (and really it is!), but the provision kept coming!  On the way home, Vivian shared how the Lord had provided freedom from another situation in her life during a Bible study earlier this week.  This revelation opened the door for the healing that took place last night.  God had prepared the way - You always know the right thing for us, Lord.

We moved on to more inconsequential conversation which led to Viv mentioning her mandolin (not the musical instrument, but the slicing/grating kitchen tool).  Now I have wanted one for a long time, but couldn't justify the cost when I have perfectly good (and very sharp) knives and a grater (or two).  *sigh*    Well, Brenna had to be at church early this morning for GA camp, so I decided to go yard sale shopping after dropping her off.  What should I find at my first stop, but an almost (if not) brand new mandolin for $15.  After some conversation, and peeking at my cute baby, the lady took $10 for it!!  Lord, you know the desires of my heart, and provide even more than just my needs - thank You!

Now here's the icing on the cake - I have felt convicted lately about not being more consistent with my quiet time and devotions and not making sure my daughter was doing the same.  I have been wondering how to institute a family quiet time, or at least something consistent.  Today, I read an article from my Parent Life magazine on just that - another provision.  Even when I think it is something that is probably inconsequential to You, You show me just how important I am, and how involved You want to be in my life - I don't deserve You, Lord, but I'm glad I have You!

So many big and small examples of just how much God loves me and provides for me in such a short time.  I wonder how many other things happen each day that I don't take notice of?

I'm sorry for not giving you credit where it due, Lord.  I thank You for providing for me each and every day, and especially for providing a way for me to have a relationship with You.  I never could have reached You in my own power, so You were willing to rescue me - even when I hated You.  And because you conquered death, I don't need to fear it, but can look forward to that day as a homecoming.  That is more than enough, but You choose to be personally involved in the minute details of my daily life.  With God all things are possible - keep on surprising me, Lord.

Milestones

It is a week of milestones at my house.  This week, my son has begun learning to walk, and my daughter has learned to ride her bicycle without the training wheels.  Wow!  The time sure does fly by.  As I cheer on my children and burst with pride each time they get up and try again after falling, I can't help but but feel wistful.  I want them to grow and learn and try new things as they move into new stages of their lives, but I will also miss the stages they are leaving behind.

I had the thought that I need to video Seth crawling down the hall, playing "chase" before he stops doing it altogether.  Soon, he will master walking, and not resort to crawling to get to his destination.  I need to get pictures of Brenna before she isn't so little anymore.  She is already so much her own person, and seems to NEED me less and less each day.

As a parent, these moves toward independence are wonderfully scary.  They show that I am doing something right, but did I do enough?  In reality, I don't think it is their preparedness that is the problem, but mine.  I want to cling to what is known.  I just started mastering the stages they are leaving, and now I have to start all over again!

Another milestone that I'll reach this year is my 10 year wedding anniversary.  I am lucky that I am not facing all these transitions alone - I have so many friends who are.  I have been blessed with someone who loves these kids every bit as much as I do.  He is their helper and cheerleader, too.  And he'll miss these days as much as I will when they are past.  Lord willing, we will still have each other and all these great memories to share.

So I guess I'll just sit back and watch my children continue the journey to becoming the individuals they were meant to be, and be thankful that I was allowed to be a part of the journey.

A Sweet, Sweet Sound...

There is nothing sweeter to my ear than to hear my children laughing and playing together.  They truly do love each other and enjoy one another's company.  The "warm fuzzies" just well up in my heart, and my love for these two little people grows a little more (if that is even possible)!  You just can't beat the sound of baby belly laughs and little girl giggles while both of them squeal with delight.

I think God must feel the same way when we come together to worship Him, and work together for His purposes.  I'm guessing there is no sweeter sound to His ear than the praise of His people when they work together in harmony.  Luckily, He just asks for a Joyful Noise - which means we are all included.  Sometimes my kids at play sounds more like a demolition, than a symphony - and that's okay.

Now, don't start thinking that I have perfect kids (HA!) or am delusional (which is questionable sometimes - I admit).  They are still quite young (my son isn't even 1 year old yet) and "new" to each other.  Even so, they have their moments - like when my daughter is trying to do homework in the floor, and my son just wants her papers!  All is not well between them in times like those, and I know as they get older the conflicts will increase (I do have friends with multiple kids, and am not too old to remember my own childhood).  So I try to remember to soak up the happiness while it is here.

As God's children, we don't always see eye to eye either.  He must get so exasperated with us.  How far are we from the days of "He's on my side of the seat"?  How about the "His new ideas are stepping on my toes, and this has been MY ministry".  Ouch!   We aren't perfect children, and sometimes we need to be disciplined.  Luckily, we have a loving Father who disciplines in love and extends mercy where needed.  He keeps no record of wrong, but does remember the sweet sound of our praise when we have our hearts in the right place.

As we near Easter, and celebrate the culmination of God's greatest plan - birthed out of his greatest love, let's set aside our differences and go back to the "love of our youth".  Let's remember the sweet feeling of being an adored child.  Let's warm the Lord's heart with the sound of his children loving each other and enjoying being together.  Let's show our love for one another, and lift up a sweet, sweet sound (even if it is a joyful noise) together.

So what's the plan?

People are usually quite sympathetic when they hear that I recently lost my job and am looking for another.  These days we all know someone (or have been someone) in the same position.  What is surprising is the reaction I get to my response.  Most are surprised, and encouraged by a viewpoint they obviously weren't expecting.  I wonder why?

My response is this:  I count it a blessing.  God must want me to be home with my family right now.  My son will only live the first year of his life once, and I'll be here to see him reach so many of those early milestones.  (He just started walking last night!).  My daughter is still learning how to navigate school and homework, and I am here to help her work through her experiences.  My husband works hard everyday, and I am here to take some of the burden of the household issues away.  Don't get me wrong, I still search for a job every day.  But for right now, I know I am where I need to be, and when it is time for me to financially help support my family again, the Lord will send the right job my way.  He will work it all out in His time, and I can have peace knowing I am in the center of His will now.

This kind of response should be "standard" for believers, but sometimes it isn't.  We're not perfect.  We still sin.  I'm not perfect.  I didn't walk out of the office for the last time with this mindset.  I was upset, even a little angry, and hurt.  My ego took a hit that day, but when I took the situation to Jesus, He wiped away my tears, and reminded me that my ways aren't always His ways.  He has a plan for me that is not necessarily my plan, but it is a better plan - one to offer me a future and a hope.

I am so thankful for the past few months of getting to be "just" a wife and mother.  God took something that the devil would use to harm me, and brought so much good from it.  So, I'll just rest in His plan, and take this day by day.  So far, it's been an adventure beyond my wildest dreams!

"What did you do today?"

This is an almost daily question from my husband.  Considering how busy I am, I sometimes think "Can't you look around and tell?"  Then I realized that maybe it wasn't so obvious.   Like any mom, I am forced to multi-task, and I can, but I personally work best when I can focus on one thing at a time.  So, if my big accomplishment was looking for a job and vacuuming, and the kids have played since I vacuumed, the house doesn't look very different.  Same for dusting and countless other "chores" I do during the day.  By focusing on one chore at a time, the rest of the mess is still there, and it looks (and feels) like I haven't accomplished much of anything.  No wonder he wonders what I do!

Luckily, a very wise friend told me that when she was a stay-at-home mom she would concentrate on one room at a time.  That way she could see a difference, and felt like she accomplished something.  She also shared that her husband didn't have the same expectations of her that she had.  He just wanted a hot meal, a clean place to sit, and a happy wife.  Whew!  Here I was trying to have a clean, picture-perfect house, fix a hot meal, find a job, and keep the kids happy - I wasn't delivering on those, so there wasn't a happy wife!

I am so thankful that my husband's love for me isn't contingent on my efforts for perfection - I fall so short!  I'm even more thankful that God's love for me isn't contingent on me achieving some semblance of perfection.  I'd be hopelessly lost if that were the case!  He took me "just as I am" and has been renovating ever since.  I'll just have to start working like Him - room by room.

And we're off!

In January I was given the opportunity to be a stay-at-home Mom (AKA: laid off from my job).  We pulled our son from daycare and cancelled our daughter's after-school care to save money while I look for a job.  My initial thought was "think of all the things I'll get done around the house, and special projects I'll finally have time to complete".  Needless to say, I don't know where all the "extra time" I thought I would have went, but it definitely did not stay at my house!

Thankfully,  I have an able God, wonderful friends, and a great church family that are helping me navigate this new world - from couponing and living on a single-income to home management and just plain keeping my sanity.  What would I ever do without my support system?

Some days I feel like I work harder and get less accomplished now than I did when I was working a 40+ hour week outside the home.  This ain't easy!!  So, I'll use this blog to share wisdom that is shared with me (I'm definitely not generating this stuff!), and try to make someone else's Daily Grind a little easier and brighter, too!

Let's journey together!